Archive | March, 2010

hump

31 Mar

so the honeymoon is over. in order to distract myself from my somewhat mundane day/week/job, etc i feel like a funny lady.

and for the life of me i cannot figure out why posting videos has become this really difficult- like brain surgery or story problems- difficult, alas it is beyond me, so i can only provide you with a link, but it’s a good time so go to this link: funny lady

it’s a special treat featuring mary louise parker and cat davis.

one of them is a lesbian. the other is not.

i told you it was hump day. brain=mush.

and thank you for enduring my run on sentence up there.

music mommas

29 Mar

woa! this day is half way over and i’m just barely through my emails, so in the vein of catching up, how about a little telephone. featuring two of barbarella’s favorite mommas- lady gaga and beyonce.

click on that above link because for some reason i can’t figure out how to post it and i’m too busy to figure it out and i will start swearing soon, but enjoy these pics instead and note the fantastic hot mess prison scene in the video.


shabbat shalom

28 Mar

so it is the last day of my lovely unpaid four week vacation. and it has been truly wonderful. i am all about not working. the thing is i’m a working gal. i have always worked- save a little stint while i was in grad school (which was short lived). i was that kid who had a job at 15 and before that was always trying to find ways to make money- reason being: i like to shop. and i still do, however, there are other things i like to do now. i like to take walks, i love to go the beach, i like to quilt, i like to read and i love to cook. (god i sound like a victorian socialite). so this little sabbath day post is kind of an important one to me- it’s a bit of an update. i feel my life priorities shifting a bit and i really owe that to my job, who didn’t want to pay me for four weeks and sent me on my way to discover this: i don’t need to make a lot of money. i need to prioritize things and do what is most important: keep my family and friends close and make sure i get to the ocean at least once a week.

fridays are fucking fabulous

26 Mar

movie day! yup, i’m off to be entertained and today it will be with chloe. this movie is looking super hot, so hopefully it will pay off. but you know the frenchies, they can usually pull off a sexy movie.

yeah, amanda seyfried and julianne moore? yes please.

Yes, sometimes I like to go out among my people, be like them, ordinary, ‘evil’ as you call it.

23 Mar

i am filled with the tralalalas of free time. which essentially means i am reading a lot of blogs, watching a whole lot of HGTV and spending some time at the beach. and eating ramen, because free time also means no pay time.it’s funny not working. i go outside and think, are all of these people not working? or are they vacationing? maybe just took a mental health day? i dunno but the streets of west l.a. are filled with lots of people, definitely not at work.

without the bothers of work stuff polluting my mind i realized there is one thing on my mind. in fact it’s quite pervasive.

sex.

like a whole lot. there is this whole campaign about men thinking about sex every seven seconds. i have no idea if i think about sex every how ever many seconds, but i do know it is there in my head much of the time. and i started thinking, i wonder why we demonize men for supposedly thinking about sex so much more then women. and i don’t even know if that’s true. cause guess what? i’m a lady and i think about it too. and i know a lot of other ladies that do too.

what does “thinking” about sex even mean? actual sex or looking at this as you are casually walking down the street?

okay maybe you only see this in west hollywood, but still….

and i’ve definitely been caught in this act (although with a slightly less judgmental face than miss sophia loren)

so does that count as thinking about sex? and what about all that i am accosted with everytime i turn on my t.v. or walk out of my house for that matter? carl’s jr. commercials, oh hell any commercial! there are beautiful people barely dressed wherever i go, so does that make me a pervert? nope, i’m pretty sure that makes me normal. and advertising has achieved exactly what it set out to do, sell me on sex. so in a way, i am being programmed to think about sex, a lot (that is if i ever go online or outside or turn on a television), but on the other hand i like sex and like thinking about it. i like to see cleavage and crotch shots. i’m not sure about putting a sexual divide on this matter. not sure if men really think about sex more then women, perhaps they do, i’m not a dude nor do i actually know very many but as for me and my house, we will think about sex. often.

music mommas

22 Mar

okay, i’ll admit that i’m not the most informed american. but that does not stop me from having my opinions!  that being said, i understand that there will be some negative repercussions with the new health care bill, but wow! health care bill! passage of health care bill! wahoo! it just makes me excited that there is some movement. now if only we could keep our roe vs. wade rights and our yet to be determined lgbt rights. sigh. so because it’s a political day, i give you a political lady.

ani difranco.

the first time i ever saw her play was in london at the forum in 1999. i had barely even heard of her, but when i saw her play and play and play i think i actually fell in love with her. from to the teeth:

look at where the profits are
that’s how you’ll find the source
of the big lie that you and i
both know so well
by the time it takes this cultural
death wish to run its course
they’re gonna make a pretty penny
and then they’re all going to hell

yup, 10 years later and still culturally and socially relevant. thank god for righteous babes.

fridays are fucking fabulous

19 Mar

i think i’ll do a little catching up.

i’ve been reading some of my old journals, one my mother started for me when i was 2 or 3 years old. it’s a weird thing, reading about yourself. and it’s even weirder reading your own writing. it’s slightly horrifying and a bit facsinating.  at times i recognize myself and recall what some of the events felt like, but mostly it’s this other world.

i find myself sort of looking for something, some clue as to who i am now, why i do the things i do, if i was always they same person and i guess my anti-climatic answer is simply, yes and no.  i guess i’ve always been a bit dramatic. i’ve always tended to compartmentalize things (as evidenced by my several journals and now several blogs). i didn’t always hate my birthday. i didn’t always hate church.

was i always gay?

blank stare.

i guess part of me is still looking for answers.

green gays

17 Mar

it is me. i’m an irish lesbian and it is st. patrick’s day.

it’s boring news to me that the gay and lesbians have been told they cannot participate in the st. patrick’s day parade in new york city. so boring. i’ve been to that parade and guess what? it’s a whole lot of policeman and fireman marching- not that i’m ungrateful, but go to any gay pride parade and the clear winner sticks out. we know how to have a parade.

in less boring news i have decided to show off a couple of lesser known irish lesbian writers (my favorite sort):

Eva Selina Gore-Booth- a suffragette and editor of the Women’s Labour News. After her death her partner, Esther Roper had her poetry published.

Kate O’Brien- a published author who wrote about the constraints of a catholic and bourgeois society on women in Ireland.

Edith Sommerville and Violet Martin who wrote under the name Sommerville and Ross and enjoyed a successful writing career togetherlove my irish ladies!

music mommas

16 Mar

going to try and slowly get back into the swing of things, one step at a time. beginning with music mommas, albeit a day late.

and since i’m leaving las vegas, a word on the catchy tunes of miss sheryl crow.

now i’m not a huge fan, but i can appreciate the woman. and that was a good song, it’s one of those songs you can just belt out and have a good time with.  look at these lyrics! they made me giggle and no doubt when i’m driving through barstow tomorrow i’ll be looking for that trucker.

Used to be I could drive up to
Barstow for the night
Find some crossroad trucker
To demonstrate his might
But these days it seems
Nowhere is far enough away
So I’m leaving Las Vegas today

sheryl crow is kind of hot though, i never realized….

um…

and she is performing for lillith fair- if the god damn tickets ever go on sale! sheesh!

fridays are fucking fabulous

5 Mar

note my lack of blogging, well that’s because when you are on vacation the whole week is fucking fabulous! i have to say i have really enjoyed watching daytime television, hanging out in lounge pants and experiencing my first snow of the year.  also seeing so many friends that i haven’t seen in far too long.

a couple of days ago i met up with a friend at a coffee shop (and learned a lot more about boba tea then i ever needed to know) we started talking about depression and repression and all that light hearted coffee talk. we were discussing the possibility of depression being a natural part of life, especially when going through a transition. i started thinking about my own relationship with depression and antidepressants.

in my early 20s i was in a bit of a funk, actually it was pretty dark.  it involved me nearly dropping out of college to stay in bed and watch dawson’s creek reruns. a doctor put me on prozac, which i was on for about 5 years.

prozac got me out of bed and back in school, but it also numbed me out. retrospectively, i think it was a crucial time in my life. i really do believe that something was trying to manifest itself that was incongruent with the way i was living my life, which made me sad and i didn’t know how to deal with it. so i pushed it down and took some drugs and wondered why i was never really happy.  i got off antidepressants mostly because i couldn’t afford them. in less then a year i was questioning my religion, my future and  dating a woman. once i finally accepted some things (primarily that i liked women) things started falling into place. i have never been happier and i can say that without being ironic or silly. in fact, people in my life often comment that they’ve never seen me looking this good.  i’m not trying to make a major statement about prozac specifically, or even anti-depressants generally, only that for me i feel like i wasted a lot of time trying to figure out this supposed “chemical” imbalance when i am quite certain it had nothing to do with that whatsoever. it was never an option to be a lesbian. and now, quite simply there is no other option. so here’s to feeling good, loving myself and being generally happy.